Chapter Three of Cats are Cool

Princess, the Green-Eyed Monster

The truth is, Princess is a really beautiful cat, with soft grey fur and big round green eyes. Her eyes are so big that some people say she looks like an owl. That’s not why I called her a green-eyed monster, however! You may not know what a green eyed monster is either, but Princess will teach you all about it.

After Princess had lived with me for about two years and the two of us were very happy together, a friend of mine (yes I finally made friends in Rio de Janeiro!) had to travel to China for about a year. She had a cat named Muffet. Muffet couldn’t go to China, so she came to live with me for a year. I was happy to have a new friend in my house. Princess was NOT! Princess, who was so gentle and loving, suddenly began a real monster. She growled at Muffet. She fought with her. She ate her food. If I even tried to pet Muffet, Princess came running and smacked Muffet really hard. Poor Muffet! She was a timid little cat and she soon became afraid of Princess and of me.

Still, I understand how Princess felt. After all, she had had all my affection and attention to herself and now she had to share it. I remember once when and my cousin came to stay at my house. I hid all my toys and made my mother promise she wouldn’t let my cousin touch anything. Putting it simply, I was jealous. Just plain jealous that Sally, my cousin, would get something I wouldn’t. Frankly, I haven’t changed much. When I hear about how someone I know is a big success or has lots of money, I get that same kind of feeling. My stomach kind of twists up, my lips get tight, and my heart grows very small. There is a nasty feeling inside of me. I wish that person’s life hadn’t turned out so well. Or that those things had happened to me. I am JEALOUS. I have been attacked by the green-eyed monster called jealousy! I’m no different than my cat. Oh my goodness!

Have you ever had that feeling? Maybe someone at school made a better grade than you. Or a friend got a new toy, just like what you wanted, but don’t have. Or your mother gives extra special attention to your brother or sister. Can you remember sometime when the “green-eyed monster” attacked you?

The problem is that jealousy is a terrible thing. It doesn’t make us happy, nor does it help the person we are jealous of. God certainly understands that we sometimes feel that way. He doesn’t want us be jealous, however. He told us that we should NOT desire ANYTHING for ourselves that belongs to another person. That’s not easy.

To help out Princess, I decided to give her some extra love. I gave her a new food dish, just for her. When I gave attention to Muffet, I did it for from Princess. Gradually Princess began to feel I still loved her and having Muffet wasn’t going to change anything.

When you feel jealous, you can’t very well ask for a new food dish! There is something you can do, however. You can try to remember all the good things God has already given you. You can remember what a wonderful friend he is. You can recall that no matter what happens or what you do, God loves you in a special way. Each time you start to feel like the “green-eyed monster” of jealousy is getting close to you, say to yourself: “I am very special. God loves me. He cares for me.” If it helps, you can even say the words aloud. You can also ask God to take away that ugly feeling of jealousy, to learn to be content with who you are and what you have. He really will help you. You will also want to confess to God that you know jealousy is a sin and that you need His help not to feel that way anymore.

By the way, Princess and Muffet finally did learn to be friends. It took a while for Princess to get over her jealousy and Muffet to get over her timidity, but they did and the three of us lived peacefully together. I bet you can learn to live in peace without a green-eyed monster around, too!

But I LIKE Worm Theology

There is a grand old hymn, that I just love "Alas and Did My Savior Bleed" by Isaac Watts. If you don't remember it, you can listen in at the CYBERHYMNAL page.
As a child, the first verse was sung with the phrase "Would he devote that sacred head, for such a worm as I?" When I was a young woman, there was a movement to change the words to "For sinners such as I?" It was so adopted in our Baptist churches, with the very strong argument that this represents "worm theology". In the 70's there was a current of thought that all that was wrong with people could be cured by increasing their self-esteem. People just needed to believe that they were special in God's eyes and all would be okay. We certainly could not lower people's self-image by calling them worms. That is very bad theology. I bought into it hook, line, and sinker. (Ok, for you who are not Americans, that is a fishing image that means that I believed it totally.) As a teacher, and Christian educator I taught, for many years, that we have to avoid anything in our classrooms that will make our little angels believe they anything less than wonderful. I touted the line I heard my own preacher say from the people "I ain't junk because God don't make no junk". I was suspicious that anyone too humble really had an issue with self-esteem. I was sure that God made no one to be a worm.
And in a way I was right. God didn't create people to be worms. Nevertheless, we CHOSE to become worms. Yip, I have come to the conclusion that "we is worms", nasty, ugly, little dirt loving, slimy (sorry, I know worms aren't really slimy), disgusting creatures.
You know how I came to that conclusion? I threw my psychology/pedagogy books out the window and started paying more attention to the Word of GOD.
Isaiah 41:14 - Fear not, you worm Jacob,you men of Israel!I am the one who helps you, declares the Lord;your Redeemer is the Holy One of Israel.
Job 25: 4-6 - How then can man be in the right before God? How can he who is born of woman be pure? Behold, even the moon is not bright, and the stars are not pure in his eyes; how much less man, who is a maggot, and the son of man, who is a worm!”
Oops! Turns out, compared to God, we really are worms. And that is the simple truth. We are so far removed from God's sanctity, we really are disgusting. Of course in a world that's allergic to the word sin, no one wants to hear that truth. We go to church to feel good, right? Not to be condemned.
Well it's about time we felt condemned by our sinful nature. That we feel revulsion when we see who we are and what we have done to a righteous God. That we enter into his presence with trembling. That we fall on our knees in contrition over our sins and call out with Isaiah: "Woe is me, for I am a sinner".
Mostly what we like to say is "Oh boy, how I love Jesus. How he loves me. I feel so good. I am so good. Goody, goody, goody. I am friends with God. Wow. Aren't I special?" To paraphrase some of the theology of our current songs and liturgy.
Me, I've had enough of feeling good about myself. When it's dark and I am all alone, I know it is all a pretense, a show. I have to agree with Paul's words in 1Timothy 1:15 - "Here is a trustworthy saying that deserves full acceptance: Christ Jesus came into the world to save sinners-- of whom I am the worst." I am a sinner - the worst in the world. Sinner #1.
Ah, but it was for that reason that Jesus Christ came into the world. Paul says it better in verse 16 - "But for that very reason I was shown mercy so that in me, the worst of sinners, Christ Jesus might display his unlimited patience as an example for those who would believe on him and receive eternal life."
Friends, I think we have let the world's wisdom lead us down a garden path, into a place where our theology really stinks. (By that I mean it's rotten.)
I am tired of listening to the WORLD'S voice on how to be a leader, how to live your life, how to be happy, how to get rich, how to do anything. I want to hear God's voice on the subject. Yes, I am still reading lots of books, but trust me, I am not buying anything until I really analyze it in the light of Word of God.
Am I a worm? Yes I am. I am a sinner. A disgusting sinner. A slimy sinner. A nasty sinner. I don't know how the Sovereign God, the Ruler of the Universe can stand to look at me. BUT the Good News is that He does. Through his Son, Jesus Christ I have been redeemed. I have received his grace. By his favor I can lift my head from the dirt. And that's why I can sing with Isaac Watts, "but drops of grief can ne'er repay, the debt of love I owe." If I was already wonderful, then why did Jesus need to die? Why should I be grateful?
It is so much better to recognize that I am a worm, than to suspect others think I might be and then try to prove otherwise. That makes for a lot of conflict and pride. I have to work twice as hard to prove I really am a butterfly inside. Me, I know I am a worm. I don't have to prove anything. I can live in joy because Jesus freed from that. I agree with Isaac: "Dissolve my heart in thankfulness and melt mine eyes to tears ...Here Lord I give myself away, tis all that I can do".
So, don't you think it's pretty wonderful receiving God's umerited grace/favor, than trying to be good enough to deserve it?
Me, I kinda like worm theology. Crazy, eh?

Chapter Two of "Cats are Cool"

I am so happy some of you have written to say you are enjoying some of my "cat devotionals". I enjoyed writing them, originally in Portuguese. I have done some revising and have added some stories for clarity and I have an outline of new ones to write about my cat in Canada and also Mia. Since I am trying to put the stories in chronological order, those will have to wait a while. I have over 20 stories, so this will be long process of gradually posting these devotionals. Today I post my second devotional. By the way, the illnesses Princess suffered from were a very severe case of ringworm (which I also caught), a weakening of her immunities and a very low blood count.

One Very Sick Little Kitty

By now you know that Princess was a very special kitten to me. She was very young and small when she came to live with me. After just a short time with me, I noticed she didn’t seem very well. So I took her to the veterinarian so he could check her out. Sure enough, she was very ill. She had to take several kinds of medicine. The worst part was that she had a terrible skin disease that might cause her to lose all her beautiful fur. I bought all her medicine and began to give it to her.

All that medicine for such a little kitty, was just too much medicine. She began to grow sicker and sicker. She was throwing up nonstop and I stayed up all night trying to help her. Finally I called the vet and he met me at his office very early in the morning and we had to put Princess in the hospital. He said she could even die. I was overcome with sadness. I didn’t know what to do. There was nothing I could do to save her. Could I possibly pray to God? Could it be that I could bother God with such a small thing? There are so many terrible things happening in the world. Surely one little cat couldn’t be important, could she?

Do you sometimes feel like that? Your little problems aren’t worthy of God’s attention? That God doesn’t care about the small things? That was what I was feeling. But then I remembered something about God caring about the birds. I thought for a minute and remembered the words of Jesus:

"Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from the will of your Father. And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered. So don't be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows". – Matthew 10:29-31 (NIV)

I was so glad that I had memorized Bible verses once upon a time! They helped me right then, when I was in doubt. I began to think: “God cares about the sparrows. He knows how many hairs are on my head. He surely cares about Princess. I can certainly pray to Him about her. I don’t know what his answer will be. But I know I can talk to Him and He will hear my prayers and do just right thing for me.”

I felt better right away. I didn’t have to worry. I could count on God! The next day Princess was still quite ill, but at least she could come home. She was ill for a long time. No one could come near her and I had a lot of trouble cleaning all my clothes and house because her illness was contagious, even to people. I was teaching children at my church and they were all interested in Princess, too. Soon they began to pray with me about her health.

Princess did lose most of her fur, but at the same time, her health began to get better. Soon her fur grew back and she no longer had to take any medicine. One day I looked at her and she was beautiful and healthy again and I knew that she was going to be okay. I thanked God that He had said yes to my prayers. I also thanked Him because I had learned that I could turn to Him no matter how big or small my worry was.

Is there anything that is worrying you? Is there something that makes you sad? It doesn't matter what it is, whether it’s a huge thing or just a small issue, you CAN talk to God about it. He really does care.

You know, that just might be the most important thing I ever learned from Princess!

God's Plans, Our Priority

Happy Birthday, Dear Church, Happy Birthday to you. Sunday, the 24th, was the 124th anniversary of our church. Since Brazilians love and cherish big blowout birthday celebrations, (and sometimes it is hard for me to remember HOW very important birthdays are to almost all Brazilians), our church was no exception. All month we've been celebrating. Our theme verse was Jeremiah 29:11, "God's Plans, Our Priority".
Saturday, the 23rd, we had an all day prayer meeting, from 6AM-6PM. It was a wonderful day of prayer. I really loved the day, although I missed a couple of hours, since I came home to do lunch and rest some. Every 30 minutes a different person leads the prayer/Bible reading/devotional/music. So it was very different every 30 minutes, as were the types of prayer and the prayer requests. I loved the whole day.
Sunday morning the church was packed, so the singing was inspired. We had a guest preacher who did a great job. There were a lot of decisions for re-dedication of lives.
Sunday night was the representation of the musical "Experience with God". The invites we used are the figure to the left. We had a goal of 200 visitors. There were many more. Very literally it was Standing Room Only at the church. We had a guest choir singing with our choir. The presentation was much more smooth this time than at Easter. I thoroughly enjoyed it. The message was very spiritual and meaningful. The multi-media presentation that accompanied it, added so very much. The children's choir also had a part and they, as usual, made everyone cry with the sweetness of the message. There were a number of decisions, and the church was well prepared to counsel the people. Afterwards it seems no one wanted to leave, although the service was quite long. I know we didn't get home until 10:30 and there were still people at church.
I am grateful to William Buck and Anna Bagby, who started this church with just themselves and two English ladies on August 24th, 1884. It must have been quite a battle for them. But their sacrifices were quite blessed.
Our anniversary offering was designated for the construction of the sanctuary of our congregation. Our goal is R$60,000 and I hope we reach that goal. We are about half-way there, I think. What a great birthday present! We also have the goal of sponsoring two more congregations over the next year or so. Right now we support our congregation, paying part of the pastor's salary. We also support, financially, another congregation not too far away.
Next year will be 125, so it should be quite a celebration. I'll let you know. Today I need to rest up from all the partying!

Princess, Peggy's cat

Hey, thanks guys for your interest. I told you if got a couple of yeses, I would carry on. And I did get 4 yeses, so here is my first story about my cat Princess.
Someone asked, so I'll mention the fact that I was thinking of 9 year olds for my audience, give or take a few years. I think a child of this age could read the stories - one a day - or a younger child could have their parents read the stories to them. If I could draw from my imagination, I would love to be able to sketch these stories. The best I can do is include a photo now and then.

Princess, my friend

I enjoy having friends around me. I don’t especially enjoy being alone. When I moved to Rio de Janeiro, in Brazil, I didn’t know very many people. I was pretty lonely. I didn’t have anyone to talk to at night when I got home from work. Everyone was so busy coming and going, I hardly ever saw my neighbors.

When I adopted Princess, my beautiful long-haired cat, things began to change. She was my very first friend in Rio. When I came home at the end of the day, she was at the door, meowing. She walked around my ankles, so I couldn’t walk until I reached down to pet her. When I sat down, she jumped up in my lap and began to purr. When I went to bed, she slept on the far corner, just close enough to be company, but far enough away not to disturb my sleep. When I was sick, she would lie with her paw on my arm, not moving until I moved. When I was sad, she seemed to know it and she would play with her toys and make me play with her, until I cheered up. When I was tense, just touching her long silky fur made me feel calm again. She came to live with me, just when I needed her most. Princess became an important friend to me.

Not only was she my friend, I was her friend. I gave her lots of attention. I talked to her. I gave her food and water everyday. I took her with me to work and on my trips. I combed her long fur to keep away the knots. During the long hot days of the summer in Rio de Janeiro, I kept the air conditioning on, just so she wouldn’t get over heated. I tried to take care of all her needs. She was my friend and I was her friend.

That’s what friendship is all about. Spending time together. Enjoying being together. Thinking about what the other person needs. My friendship with Princess made me think about other friends and what kind of friend I really was. Most importantly, my friendship with Princess made me think about one special friend. Not just any friend, but my very best friend. My friend that always loves to be with me. My friend who always understands me. My friend that makes me happy. My friend who enjoys me and makes me feel special like no one else can.

You know who that is? He’s Jesus. He is a perfect friend. He cares for me in a way no one, anywhere else, ever has or ever will. It’s nice being friends with Princess. It’s fantastic, it’s wonderful, it’s fabulous (can you think of any other great words?) being friends with Jesus. He really is the bestest of the best friends.

Thanks, Princess, for reminding me that my best friend is Jesus!

Wouldn't You Like to Read the Book I'm Writing?

Well, would you? Or maybe you wouldn't... This week I had an idea. Many years ago I wrote a small story about my cats, for a children's magazine in Brazil. I started writing it each quarter. It was actually a devotional for young children. Lots of people, even adults, liked the stories. While in Canada, I began translating them into English and putting them into book form. So this week, I got to thinking, how about if I begin to publish the book on my blog? You could read the chapters and begin to offer your feed back on them. You must remember, however, that the audience is children. Even so, I think most adults will also enjoy reading the stories. So here goes the introduction to the book. If you think I should post more entries with the actual stories, make a comment and let me know if it is a good idea. If I get a few yeses, I will try to add another story every couple of days or so. If no one makes a comment, then I'll get let it drop.

My Cats are Cool… or
My Cat School

Is there anything you have ever wanted, but couldn’t have? I always wanted a cat. I couldn’t have one. My mom wouldn’t let me. As I walked home from school everyday, I played with every stray cat in the neighborhood. I tried to bribe them to stay in my garage by putting out saucers of milk. It never worked. They seemed to know that my mother had absolutely forbidden any cats in our family.
When my sister grew up, got married and left home, she adopted a cat. In fact she adopted four cats. I sort of felt like their aunt. Whenever I went to her house, I pretended the cats were mine. They weren’t. It just wasn’t the same as having a cat of my own.
Some time later I went off to live in Korea, far from home and guess what I got? A cat. I was teaching school and I let my students give him a name. They decided to spell my last name, Smith, backwards and somehow came up with the name of Thims. We didn’t realize until a couple of weeks later that we had made a mistake in spelling. Error and all the name stuck. Unfortunately, the cat didn’t, since the girl that lived with me was not fond of cats. It just didn’t work out for us to keep a cat, when my roommate felt the same thing for cats that my mother did. My experience with Thims did convince me that I REALLY, REALLY did want a cat of my own.
Unfortunately, I had to wait a long time. It seems there are a lot of people in this world like my mother. They don’t like cats. Especially people who rent apartments. I moved to a lot of places, but no one would allow me to have my own cat. I just kept on being an “aunt” to my sister’s cats.
When I moved to the city of Rio de Janeiro, in the country of Brazil, I noticed people in my building had dogs and birds for pets. No one had a cat. But pets were allowed. No one had a cat, because cats weren’t all that common as pets. I suppose you figured out that it didn’t take me long to change that. I finally got my cat. Her name was Princess because I thought she was the MOST special cat in the whole wide world. I loved having a cat and I loved Princess.
Now I have had several cats, besides Princess. I have loved them all. They changed my life and taught me a lot of things. Yes, my cats taught me! They made me think and feel new things. I felt rather selfish keeping all the things they had taught me to myself, so I thought I would share them with you.
I know that cats are cool, I just didn’t know that one day I would be enrolled in a very special cat school. My teachers, at the cat school, were excellent. I invite you to come learn with me at our very own Cat School. Your teachers will be Princess, Muffet, Baby, Dolly Sadik, and Mia, my cats over the last 20 years. You will meet all of them along the way. I warn you, though, they will make you think. They will make you feel new things. If you aren’t ready to be changed, just a little bit, stop reading right now!

Have a laugh on me

Have a laugh on me! A friend of mine sent this joke to me today and I just couldn't resist passing it along as it really is a good one! (Thanks Marilois)
By the way, if you want a good laugh over cats and photos you can visit the blog "I Can Has Cheeseburger" (The first blog on the left in my bloglist.) I will warn you, though, it is an addictive site.

THE FOUR CATS

Four men were bragging about how smart their cats were.
The first man was an Engineer,
the second man was an Accountant,
the third man was a Chemist, and
the fourth man was a Government Employee.

To show off, the Engineer called his cat, 'T-square, do your stuff.'
T-square pranced over to the desk, took out some paper and pen and promptly drew a circle, a square, and a triangle.
Everyone agreed that was pretty smart.

But the Accountant said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said,
'Spreadsheet, do your stuff.'
Spreadsheet went out to the kitchen and returned with a dozen cookies. He divided them into 4 equal piles of 3 cookies.
Everyone agreed that was good.

But the Chemist said his cat could do better. He called his cat and said, 'Measure, do your stuff.'
Measure got up, walked to the fridge, took out a quart of milk, got a 10 ounce glass from the cupboard and poured exactly 8 ounces without spilling a drop into the glass.
Everyone agreed that was pretty good.

Then the three men turned to the Government Employee and said, 'What can your cat do?'
The Government Employee called his cat and said, 'Coffee Break, do your stuff.'
Coffee Break jumped to his feet.......

Ate the cookies...... ..
Drank the milk.......
Then fell sick…
Filed a grievance report for Food poisioning.......

Put in papers for Workers Compensation. .......... ....and
went home for the rest of the day on Sick leave....... .....

Happy Birthday Dear Blog

During the month of August I am comemorating the 4th aniversary of my blog. Yes, can you believe it? I actually stuck with something for longer than 2 months. You know most people abandon their blog rather quickly. I almost quit about 2 years ago. But here I am still boring you. While I am on the subject of boring you... on to my two favorite subjects - drawing and my cat! I actually did finish Mia's portrait today. I learned a lot about shading while doing a black cat. I didn't realize there are so many shades of black. I got pretty good at manipulating an eraser, I can tell you. At any rate, Happy Birthday to my BLOG.

A woman with an identity

I am no longer documentless. Do you like that word? I do because it means that I am now the proud owner of an identity card (for foreigners) in Brazil. I have been waiting and waiting for ever so long for my new card. Well, actually it's been only 18 months, since it took some months for my actual permanent residence to be approved. I had lost my permanent resident status after my 5 years out of the country. I periodically check online to see if the card was ready, but always got an instant no. When a new screen flashed up yesterday, I was in a state of shock, I was so surprised. Today we went out to the airport, headquarters of the immigration police, and picked up my card. There had been a big bru-ha-ha when I did my application back in 2006 that there was a discrepency between the application and my marriage certificate in the spelling of Dad's name. They had William with an "N" on the certificate and they went round and round with me and I finally told them to spell it however they wanted. Then they said that if it wasn't right I would have all kinds of problems later. I told them I would fix that later. So I fully expected to have his name spelled wrong and have to pay a correction fee and then wait another 18 months for a corrected card. But what do you know? It was spelled correctly, just like on my previous card, before I went to Canada. I even had the same number. One less thing to remember. That means all I have to do is go and get another copy of my marriage certificate, as we were able to verify that in the original register it is actually spelled correctly - back in 1993 (surely sounds weird to think of 1993 as "back then"), they actually hand typed the certificate copies and someone made a small typing mistake that turned out to be a big pain in the neck for me. The bureaucracy here drives me nuts sometimes, but today I am happy.
On that note, however, I must add that something that concerns me is that I am seeing the USA turn into a bureaucratic state. I have been shocked at how complicated things have become there. There is talk of a national identity card. I HATE that idea and consider it very anti-democratic as well as repressive on the part of the government. I am frustrated by the fact that a few years ago I could renew my driver's license based on my Brazilian license with no red tape whatsoever and recently I was refused to renew that license (in the same state of Kentucky in the same Boone County) because I didn't have a birth certificate (but I did have a passport, the idiots) and a current Social Security Card (I do have one, but it was in Brazil at the time). What has happened to the days when a man's word was his bond. I now hate entering the US via airports as everyone is treated not only as a terrorist suspect, but with outright rudeness and disrespect. I miss smiles, politeness and common courtesy. I know that makes me sound old and stodgy. I love change, innovation, gadgets, gimmicks, electronics and new things in general. Really I do. But I hate change for the worse and that's what I think is happening. So if your candidate is proposing or supporting a national identity card, think twice about voting for him. Trust me, additional paperwork is NEVER a good thing.

No way... I'm much better looking

People, I just couldn't resist these photos! When I saw that Mia had jumped up on my desk and was looking at her portrait, I had to show her reaction. At first it looks like she is just horrified. I can almost hear her saying: "No way! That "thing" isn't me. I protest. I am much better looking!"

Then Miss Mia asks for some time to think about it. She squintches (is that a word, by the way?) her eyes closed tight so she doesn't have to look at that horrible thing. She tries to express her deep indignation at the inability of the artist to capture her marvelous beauty. Of course, the artist protests: "But I haven't finished yet. Wait until I am done."

In complacency, Mia gives the artwork one more look, shakes her head in disgust and then takes a beautiful pose as if to say "Well, if you really want to draw me, why don't you try again using this lovely pose?"

What's the News, What's the Buzz?

I really haven't fallen off the face of the earth. I was out of town last week, which made it hard to do an entry in my blog. Then, when I returned, I was playing catch up. So now let me catch you up a little on all that is happening around here. Saturday, the 2nd, we had a "Country" party at church. It was a lot of fun. We had and accordion player, country dancing, a mechanical bull, and lots of other entertainment and great food. It really was a lot of fun for us all and a surprising success, as a kickoff to our 124th anniversary at the church. I was ever so cute in my cowboy hat. I did enjoy the evening. On the following Monday we went out of town, together with our minister of music, to a national music minister's retreat, where João was the keynote speaker. It was like crazy getting everything ready for that and leaving everything ready for the next week at church. We didn't return until Thursday morning, so four days away is a lot. It was nice to meet new people, see old friends and hear some good music. I emphasize some, because unfortunately even many of our "musicians" have fallen victims to thinking we have to sing endless, repetitive chorus, with a lot of talky-talk between, and then play mindless tunes while we are supposed to be in prayer. ARGH!!!!! Fortunately that didn't take place in every session. It certainly makes me grateful for my church where we don't have all that yakety-yack and "praise time" that lasts 90 minutes. I am becoming old and grumpy I suppose!

The good news on our return is that our church staff is growing. We had recently invited a young man (well anyone in their 20's is young to me!) to be our youth minister and we received the news that he accepted. We are thrilled. João decided to announce the news Sunday night. You can see him, together with his lovely wife, at the podium in prayer at the close of our service Sunday night. Everyone is well pleased. He has been the chaplain at our school and is well liked by our youth and our deacons and so he already has a head's up. We still have to work out when he will start and when his installation (induction) service will be, but that is just "gravy".

We are praying for God to show us the right person for children's ministry as well. Our main candidate, already a church member and one of my ex-students, just didn't feel she wanted to take this one right now. So we are praying and seeking the right person. It is exciting to see things fall into place ever so slowly.

Today we had a lovely lunch with João's old seminary roomate, who is home from South Africa (as a missionary). We have entertained both he and his wife on separate occasions over the past two years, but had not had a chance to be with both of them together. It made for a great day.

I have been drawing off and on over the last few weeks. I did a couple of Degas' dancers and one of his nudes (that I won't be putting on my blog) and am now involved in drawing Mia. It looks just like her and I am excited. But drawing in the fur takes forever. It is hair by hair and is very slow. I am having some neck and arm pain, so I am taking it easy on the drawing these days. I think I have overreached my boundaries in that area, for I have had chronic problems with my neck for years and years, although it's been at least 15 years or so since I've had a flare-up. Consequently I will be trying to diminish my computer use for a while, until it quits bothering me. That being said, that's about all I have to say for now.

Slightly Less Crazy

Today I am feeling slightly less crazy. I took a couple of days off, and then when I did some drawing I copied some photos and old masters. That helped me regain a little confidence. I branched out into colored paper, white crayon  and even some colored pencil highlights. It was fun to try to copy Longhi's study of two peasants and one of Degas' famous ballerinas. I love Degas. I am trying to locate a DVD of the PBS special on Degas from a couple years back.
The swan drawing came from an exercise in a drawing magazine that I buy every now and then.  I loved working on the black paper, although I really had a mess of white everywhere, since it was pastel I was using. We are currently on recess from my classes and so I am having fun doing what I want.  I finally worked up the courage to finish my graphite drawing. I scanned it and then did it in sepia (on the computer) to soften up some of the parts where the paper flaked off from erasing it so many times. I think you'll see an improvement from the previous self portrait. Still not exactly me, but I think it's closer. I don't quite seem to bring me to life... of course it doesn't help I'm not smiling. But I am not crazy enough to try to draw teeth yet. I'll get there some day. Rome wasn't built in a day, you know.
Things are pretty quiet on the home front these days. I am cook and clean and grocery shop, answer my e-mails, do some drawing and of course spend lots of time in prayer and Bible study. I am preparing four messages for September. I will be preaching at a women's camp back in Vitória, where I first started my work here in Brazil. Although I've been gone for 20 years, I still have a lot of friends there. It will be nice to see them. And I love working on the messages.
I was reading Challie's blog the other day (it's in my list of blogs on my sidebar) and he said there are two types of devotional reading. One that is broad, with no definite direction or goals and that which is focused and study oriented. I realized that when I chose and pick or even read the Bible through, as I am doing this year, I have a hard time focusing. So since I was in Isaiah in my annual reading, I decided to study, really study Isaiah and make notes on each verse or thought or chapter (depending...). So after some time, I have now completed four chapters and I am so much happier. I really really get what I am reading. If my Bible study is not fruitful, neither is my prayer time. I have also come to realize that my Bible study is also prayer... it is the part where God speaks to me. Nothing mysterious or mystical, but His Word is His voice in the world. And so much clearer and safer than waiting for a nebulous direction that comes from some kind of "gut" feeling.Temporarly I have put Isaiah on hold to study Philippians 3:12-14 and Hebrews 13:7, which will be the basis of two of my messages. I have spent over 8 hours analyzing the words of these verses. Now I will begin to put that together. Oh, how God's Word falls fresh to my ears every day! I thank God that I have the time and resources to really delve into the Bible.

Psalm 119:103 How sweet are thy words unto my taste! yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth!

Now I get it

I think I now understand why so many artists go whacky and do things like Vincent VanGogh. (Yes, I do know the real reason why he went crazy). A couple of weeks ago (make that 3!!), I started a self-portrait. I never could get the eyes right, so I gave up. I mean, I erased a hole where my eyeball should be. The rest wasn't too bad. So I decided that would be a "study" and I started over again last night. This time instead of graphite, I decided on charcoal. Personally I love working with charcoal, as it gives me a sense of freedom and is also very forgiving on the paper. Another words, I don't have to worry about erasing a hole. Ha! I basically finished it in about 2 hours. But it didn't look like me. So this morning I erased out, what? The eyes of course. I ended up redoing the eyes at least 4 different times. The nose is also a problem, as I get it too narrow or too wide. The mouth isn't too bad, although I did redo it at least twice. The hair, well I do hair well. What is there to mess up with hair? Anway, I was about ready to tear the whole operation up, after 5 or 6 hours of redoing everything. Not a waste of time, because you always learn something. But self-portraits are just really hard. You just can't be the objective. So although it's not a bad looking drawing in my not so humble opinion, it's just not "me". The strange thing is that the measurements are all right on, the shapes are right, but the whole thing just isn't me. Or maybe it is me, as I see me. I finally sprayed with finish so I could have to quit working on it. So let's just say I really get whacking off one's ear or nose or other body part that you just can't draw. I just wish it weren't so hard for me. I love the experience, but it takes me sooooooo long to finish a drawing, and then it's just not what I want. Maybe I just need to lay off the self-portraits. (By the way, the picture is not as splotchy as it looks in the scan. I used "canvas" paper and the scanner just couldn't handle the texture).
One thing I find interesting is that when I am drawing I am in another world. No time, no words, no hunger, just me and charcoal and paper. (Unfortunately the charcoal doesn't always find its way onto the paper, instead covering my hands, arms, face, hair, etc.) I realized this afternoon I had a neck ache. I had been drawing for about 4 hours and it was way past lunch time. I had no idea. That means I am working with the right side (non verbal, non linear) side of my brain. That's the most important thing about this whole experience.
On a lighter note, I finally "broke" down and bought some new dishes. Broke is the key note here. I have ceramic tile floors and marble counter tops. Guess what happens to most of my dishes? In two years I have broken 4 plates, 5 cups, 2 saucers and one bowl. So I've transferred those dishes to my kitchen and after looking and looking found something to use in my dining room, albeit not china or anything fancy, beats chipped and unmatched. As you know I just love tulips and I have a tulip oil painting in the living room. I have a red/orange wall, so I think these will go nicely. I was so pleased when they were delivered. I am doomed, however, because one of the saucers arrived broken (they are replacing it, of course). Whatcha gonna do? Maybe I should just go with plastic or paper plates... Wish you could drop in and I could make you a meal. Today I could serve you some delicious cherry-berry cheese cake (lo cal) that I made this afternoon. ... Maybe another day?

Little Boys Become Old Men

Yesterday I did what I hate to do. I have a site on Ancestry.com where I am tracing back my family tree. That I enjoy. But yesterday I had to add a date to someone. A date I don't like adding in. It is the date of someone's death. It is my mother's only "full" brother. He was 16 months older than she and they always shared a special bond. Funny, they were so different. He was a blond and she a brunette. They say he was a sweet child and Mom was, well let's say adventuresome. I think you can see in the picture, even when they were babies how different in looks they were. He took after his father (who died just a few days after Mom was born), and she after her mother.
I gather they were always good friends and allies. I love the story of their youth when they thought they were doing a great community service by getting rid of the local "bad" driver. He was an old man who couldn't see straight and drove down the middle of the road. They heard everyone complain about him. So they got the idea (and I do believe the instigator was my mother) of stretching a rope across the road, wrecking the car and then the old man wouldn't be a hazard to anyone anymore. Crazy kids, they actually did it. They knew what time he came down the road, so they stretched the rope across and laid hiding in the field to see the results of their "good deed". Unfortunately, before he meandered along, the local "cop" hit their rope and went spinning. Madder than an old wet hen at the damage (couldn't have been much), he went looking for the perpetrator. I don't know how he knew it was Uncle Bill and Mom  (I don't think they had criminal records,but I do think it happened on their property), and went looking for them or their family. He found their very strict and austere step-father. I think they both knew they were in for it. Lucky for them, he hated the cop and thought it was funny. He didn't even punish them. I still can't believe my mother wrecked a police car and lived to tell the story! Uncle Bill must have been a good guy to forgive her for all the trouble she got him into! I had never seen the photo to the right until recently. Uncle Bill is the oldest in the photo, the big blonde. Funny, all of Mom's brothers were blonde and her sister was dark like her.
Uncle Bill's signature is on Mom and Dad's wedding license, since they eloped. Uncle Bill and his girlfriend (later his wife) went with them. I have to be grateful for that, don't I? I have lots of images of him in my head, but few pictures. In this family photo, Mom is on the left end (standing) and Uncle Bill is on the back row on the far right. He was the only guy with a full head of hair, his step-brothers taking after their father. I think this must have been in the sixties (early).
Truth be told, I sometimes had a hard time calling him Uncle Bill because Mom always called him by his childhood name, Willy G. (His real name was William Goodman, named after his father and maternal grandfather). Once he commented how he hated that nickname, so I made an effort to call him Uncle Bill.
It's been several years since I've seen him, as I am not good about visiting relatives and I do live far, far away. I did talk with him on the phone whenever I was in the states, as he and Mom talked regularly.
After his wife died of Alzheimer's disease, some time back, I thought it was cool that he took a cruise to Alaska so he could say he had visited all 50 states. When he came back from Christmas in California (with his son and grandchildren) last year, my little boy Uncle who had become and "old" man, was sick with pneumonia. He never really fully recovered and so a second bout of pneumonia in July meant that yesterday he fell into a forever sleep. I have felt a deep sense of sadness and loss, most especially for my mom. It is hard to lose our elders. It is hard to lose our loved ones. It is hard to see little boys become old men.

I Scream, We scream, We all Scream for Ice Cream

Yesterday was Sissy's 22nd birthday. Can you believe it? It seems just yesterday we were celebrating her 9th birthday at DisneyWorld or her 19th in Canada, in a hot air balloon. Her 15th birthday was in Europe. This year nothing so exciting. Her sister did take her to a Sushi bar, all you can eat, for lunch. Wouldn't take long for me to get all I wanted to eat!!!! They had a great time, however.In the evening we all went out, together with Sissy's best friend, to Johnnie Pepper Restaurant.

I don't think there is an American equivalent, although the decoration and menu were all in English. Let me know, if I am wrong.
I love this photo of Sissy and Elly together. I am so happy they are such good sisters and so united. The friendship sisters share is special. No one really knows you like a sister does. You share so much of your lives together. If life is fair, you will probably have your sister as part of your life more than any other one person. You not only share the same genes, you also have shared the same bedroom, the same clothes, the same family history. To sum things up, we had a fun evening, with lots of laughter and lots of food. Elly wasn't hungry so she ordered an appetizer and ended up with a gigantic plate of nachos. I did my best to help her eat them down to a reasonable size, but the plate was still full at the end of the evening. Sissy, of course, was entitled to a free dessert.  I wanted to snap a photo of her eating ice cream and so she was checking her teeth to see if there was anything on them. I was focusing and accidentally clicked and ended up with this hysterical photo of her.

She doesn't usually read my blog, but if she does, I can hope she forgives me, but you must admit it's really funny. We all laughed hysterically when we saw it. Now to redeem myself, I'll show you the photo of her with her Colgate smile. Wow, all those years of braces were worth it. Happy 22nd Birthday.

Fondue with Friends

I enjoyed this past week, as it forced me out of my usual circle of activities. Early in the week, I had Robert Bratcher (yes the one who translated the Bible in the Good News version) at my house. He is 88 and came to celebrate the 80th anniversary of his baptism. Although his visit was ever so short, I enjoyed his presence in my home. He was born in Brazil, the son of one of our missionary pioneers (who served as interim pastor of our church in the 1930's). The stories and memories were wonderful.

He left on Monday and on Tuesday my friend Marilene arrived, sans family. It was the first time in 7 years that we have had quality "alone" time. It was so wonderful to just talk and do "nothing". Marilene has generously shared her friends with me, so that my art teacher, Gabi, came to me via her friendship. Roberta, who also studies with us, has also become a friend. So, while Marilene was here, I had them both over to have some fondue here at the house. The fondue was fine, but the conversation was even better. Isn't it nice with your friends are friends with each other? I think it is. When Marilene left on Friday, I felt kind of empty. I better understand what Jonathan felt for David when the Bible says: "the soul of Jonathan was knit with the soul of David, and Jonathan loved him as his own soul." (1 Sam 18:1 KJV) Friends do make us so much richer and add so much to our lives. We have few friends whose souls are knit to ours, thus making them more precious. 

Fortunately, on Friday one of João's friends dropped by for lunch with us and that helped fill the day. Pity I forgot to photograph our lunch of "moqueca capixaba" (it's a fish stew) that I am finally learning to make. It is a delicate operation and requires a earthen ware pot (the top of which I broke when it slipped out of my hands). I haven't got it down to be perfect, but I am getting better. So if you come to my house, now you know you won't starve. I've learned to make fondue (like that's really hard - although it is really expensive) and fish stew. Oh and add yakisoba that I have perfected recently. Some come and enjoy a meal with us.
Just so you don't forget her, I threw in a recent picture of my sweet little bundle of fur, Mia. She continues to brighten our days with her purrs, her antics, and her affectionate ways. I can hardly imagine how our life would be here without her, she is so much a part of our lives. 

It is these small and large moments of joy that add splashes of life and color to daily lives. This week could have been terribly discouraging, as it was the state Baptist convention and things did not go that well. There were heated arguments and disagreements and attitudes that made you wonder if you really were hearing pastors and church members speaking. Actually I say that, although I didn't attend. I knew what was coming and I avoid conflitual situations like the plague. João was so discouraged that he arose at 3AM to pray for the convention. By God's intervention, the 1st vice-president presided at the last meeting. Things calmed down and at least everyone agreed on a solution so it ended on a good note. I used to enjoy denominational meetings, but I find myself more and more disgusted and repulsed by them. I can hardly believe I used to be so active in such affairs, now that I am free of that. I actually feel like it was burden lifted from me. I am much happier tending to my church, my family, my friends, even my cat!

I plan to keep on doing that and I'll leave the politics to others. Go and enjoy some fondue with your friends, too!

Art Exhibit

While I was on vacation, my fellows students decided we needed to exhibit what we were learning. So today was the day for us to put our work on display for the world to see our progress. Well not exactly the world, persay, but our family and friends, anyway. Everyone else was a little more enthusiastic about the operation than I was, so fortunately the turn out was very good. I even thought of not attending, since I had no one to invite and I couldn't imagine why anyone would want to waste a perfectly good Saturday looking and the drawings of beginning art students. Since I am basically introverted, any event that has more than a few people intimidates me totally. Me, I'd rather be in my own little house. Even so, I have to admit I had a great time. I really like all the other people in my class and enjoy being with them. We never managed to get a photo of all five students and our teacher at the very same time, so I have two photos and in both our teacher, Gabi, is in the middle.

I am scattering the photos of each student's display, so you can get an idea of the fact that each person showed their drawings. It was really interesting to see everything displayed together and discover how each person's way of using their pencil, as well as their vision of the world is so very different. ( I am sorry the photos are arranged so very goofy. Blogger in an effort to "improve" what already worked quite well, changed the way of uploading pictures and now you cannot align the photos with the text. The program decides where the photos best fit. Making it impossible to put your photos and text wherever you want. BOO blogger. It was a terrible idea and NO IMPROVEMENT. I am frustrated out of mind, as I have had to upload the photos six different times - oops, make that eight). That and the tremendous progress of each student is what really stood out in everyone's evaluation. I think Gabi will have some new students since every saw how much progress had been made in just four short months. I became the biggest advertisement of all for her course when folks looked at my very first drawing of myself and of João and saw what I did last week. In fact, they put my two (before/after) drawings on the expo invitation, as my improvement was so marked. It's interesting as I never had an any particular interest in drawing and now I can hardly keep my hands off of a sketch pad. Gabi says one of the secrets of my improvement is that I draw all the time. It does help. I look at the world differently now. I try to see light and shadows and angles and think how things would look on paper. It's an interesting phenomena. In closing I want you to look at a side-by-side comparison of each student's drawing of Picasso's self-portrait as a young man. Same day. Same light. Same material (charcoal). Five different drawings. None better than the other. Just different. Mine is in the middle and the darkest you will notice. That is my characteristic - everything very dark, very shadowed.

Night in Rio

As I went to bed the other night, I glanced out the window and saw the most beautiful sight, with the moon partially covered by clouds. I was overcome by it's sad beauty. I have never liked the night or darkness. That's not a theological thing, but a psychological thing! Still, I had to admit there was beauty in the night. I wish I could say I really feel Rio is as beautiful as this. There are flashes of beauty, but this week the ugliness of our city and the sadness of tragedy was great for me. A child- who I did know - died senselessly on Sunday night, in my neighborhood. He was only three. He was in the car with his mother. The police mistook their car for that of a fleeing thief, and even as she pulled over to allow the police to pass, the police fired 30 rounds into her car, killing her child. It was so stupid and so violent! It's not enough to live with the violence of the bandits in our town. We must also fear our underpaid, poorly trained and sometimes violent police. I am so angry, so sad, so indignent that I don't know what to do about it. Pray for our city...

This, that, and the other

Okay, I'll admit it. The rainbow photo has nothing to do with anything I have to share, but yesterday it was a gloomy, stormy, chilly day and all of the sudden Joào called me and there was this gorgeous rainbow to be seen from our veranda. I grabbed the camera and ran. By the time I tried to get another shot, it had faded. But it was so clear and so big, I just couldn't resist sharing it with you. I don't think any of us ever grows out of our fascination with rainbows. When one appears, everyone comes running or stops what they are doing to look, like we've never seen one before. We have a wonderful hymn we sing here in Brazil, that says "behind every black cloud, a rainbow is hiding". Oh so true.

Life seems to be moving back into the "normal" range, readjusting to schedules after vacation. I am still going to bed late and getting up late, a habit I really need to break. This morning I had to get up early and consequently I've been groggy all day. It was the same story yesterday. Consequently my drawing class was not as productive as it might have been. We did a study for doing our own self-portrait. It was to be a 3/4 facial view, so I had to hold my head in place in order to keep it in the same position. It did not turn out all that great. Actually it's not a bad drawing. Just doesn't look like me, which was the purpose, after all. In the photo to the left you see Roberta, my classmate, and Gabi, our teacher. To the right are two other students (Marcia and Jane) in our class,with Gabi as well. As you can see, none of us are teen-agers, but I am by far the oldest (by 15-25 years) and least experienced "artist"of the group. We are going an exposition next Saturday. I will try to photograph it for you, as I think it will be a fun morning. This class has been wonderful for me, as it has not only opened my horizons for learned something new, I have made new friends. When I thought of who I might invite to our exposition, I could think of no one. I realized I really have no friends here in Rio. My life has been limited to the church and as pastor's wife, I get along with everyone, but no one is really a close friend, and it should be that way. I like the folks from my aqua class, but it's hard to really make friends when you jumping and out of breath, besides which I don't have a lot in common with them. Speaking of friends/acquaintances, I finally located the dentist I used here in Brazil before I went to Canada. She is one of the best I have ever been to and have been frustrated ever since with other denstists. Since I was dethroned during vacation (I swallowed my gold crown!), and wasn't satisfied with my dentist here, we finally found Josi and I have started back with my gum treatments. This is nothing I enjoy, trust me and I told her on Thursday I thought I would need a blood transfusion from the procedure, but it's such a relief to know I have stopped my bone loss. I had lost quite a bit of my bone and was running the risk of my teeth getting loose in my mouth. I still have 3/4 of the work to go and so I will have a swollen mouth for a while, but at least my teeth won't fall out of head.

So my life moves forward with one thing and another. I am translating the Baptist World Day of Prayer Program, working on some material for premarital counseling and involved in meetings for church, so I stay busy in my own little way. Sissy is on vacation in Campos, so the house is kind of quiet. Mia has finally accepted me back (sort of) after having transferred her allegiance to Sissy while I was on vacation. I am trying to train her to sit still so I can do her portrait (hahaha). To train me, I did my first cat portrait (from a photo) this week. What does it say about me that my portrait of a cat is 100% better than my self-portrait?