Why me?

Very often when we face a crisis, we ask, why me? Well I sort of want to turn that around and ask, upon facing very good news, why me?
Some weeks ago I was facing a biopsy for a small lump in my right breast. Although I and my many doctors (referring physician, mastologist, and two radiologists) all believed it to be benign, there is always that tiny doubt that leads you to think, what if??? So as I waited the week for the results, I played out every possibility. I never lost a minute of sleep or really worried... I just tried to figure out what I would do if...
As I prayed, I never asked God for a negative biopsy. Not for lack of faith. I do believe in the sovereignity of God, so I asked that within his will, that all that would happen would be for his glory. I asked for joy and victory, "come what may". God honoured that prayer. When the doctor handed my pathology report that said all was well (negative for cancer), I breathed a sigh of relief, a prayer of thanksgiving and cry of joy!
Yet I had to ask why me? Why did my sister among thousands of other women receive a positive for cancer? I don't know. And in the long run, you know, it doesn't matter, does it? On this side of eternity we will not know the answer to a lot of our whys. What does matter, however, is what we do with the news and how we deal with it. We have to ask the right questions. The why "mes" don't really get us anywhere at all.
I chose not to share with anyone, except João and God, this journey. Basically I am a private person about things that are near and dear. And I would still chose to be silent about this, except that I think it will be more God honouring to publically give thanks and give him the glory for this. If the news had been "bad", I would have shared that, and I believe I would have chosen to do so by giving God the glory for that as well. God is too wise to be mistaken and God is too good to be unkind.
I am so grateful to have gone through this experience to be reminded and relearn total reliance on God in any situation. I am glad to be able to repeat the truth of Paul's words "My God shall supply all your need according to his riches in glory by Christ Jesus." (Philippians 4.19)
I have also learned to stop asking so many questions and begin to submit to God's timing and action in my life. At least about the big things. Now if I can learn to deal with the small things! I do think the smaller things are often harder for me because I turn over the big stuff and kind keep the little things for me to worry about. I don't do nearly as well as God does.
Yesterday I had a very simple procedure, a video endoscope, and yet I am totally traumatized by the whole event. I was calm, cool and unworried about the thing, expecting it to be a piece of cake. I confess I never even talked to God about it. I figured it would be nothing. Maybe my doctor doesn't believe in patient education or information, but I was totally unprepared for what happened - including absolutely excruciating pain as the IV was injected (especially since he didn't even tell me he was going to do that or what he was injecting) and being totally awake and alert throughout the procedure.
You see a procedure that should have been nothing turned out to be a big bugaboo for me. Why me? Don't know and don't care. I am reminded to give over the small AND big stuff. And so I can give thanks for this as well. I learned a lot. Don't care to repeat the dose, but even as I pray for God to help me to forget the trauma, I ask him to help me to remember the lesson. It really is "all good" when we are together with God in all things. Works out nicely, don't you think? And that's the real answer to "why me?"- because it will all work out perfectly in end when we leave it in God's hands.