For the Pastor's Wives

I have done a quick and dirty translation of the short chapter I wrote for the book for Women in Ministry. I had a short space allotted for the chapter, so there was no room to write anything extensive or particularly revolutionary. Still I hope it helps you understand your pastor's wife better. If you want to share it with another pastor's wife, please feel free to do so. If you want to share your thoughts on the subject, just make a comment at the bottom of the blog entry. The book, in Portuguese, will be published in April of 2009, as part of the conference on Women in Ministry. Jill Briscoe will be the keynote speaker. I am looking forward to the event.

Married to the Pastor

I always joke that I married my husband because I liked him as a pastor. I said I was tired of getting used to a pastor and then having to switch after a few years. I solved my problem by marrying best pastor I knew.

Trust me when I say that I like – A WHOLE LOT – being the wife of my husband. I was already engaged in ministry before our marriage, but being a pastor's wife challenged me with an entirely new kind of ministry. From my own experience, and also the experience of others, I can say that being the wife of pastor is a great ministry! I feel that my ministry is to "minister to minister." By that I mean that I support my husband and do everything possible to facilitate his ministry. That is a ministry in and of itself.

Of course, this is a very personal thing. There are extroverted wives, and others who are terribly timid, each doing what she can to help her husband in her own style. Each pastor's wife will serve her husband in a different way. When she ministers well, her husband is a better pastor. I know that when I do my part, my husband can enter the pastoral office with a heart ready to counsel, preach with more joy and freedom, face meetings with less concerns, and visit the sick and troubled more willingly. That is no small thing.

I want to emphasize that no two pastoral couples have the same experience. In fact, every time I change churches, I have to adjust my ministry to that church. Each pastor's wife has a unique ministry, precisely because it is not a role tosimply be acted out. There is no such thing as a “preformed mold” for the pastor’s wife. The person who is married to the pastor is a real-life person who has to shape her own sculpture. Her personality, her talents, her interests, her gifts as well as the style of ministry of her husband will work together to form her unique style of ministry. Right now I enjoy visiting with my husband, helping in worship, standing at the door greeting people, doing administrative tasks for him, but that is who I am right now. In Canada I worked with him on his sermons in English, I led English Bible study, I did the order of worship because those were our needs there. In our other church I did the church bulletin, I led the programs for all the special holidays, did a lot of talks for church groups, and worked on many committees. Ministry evolves and changes according to the needs.

Rewards

As I said, I love being a woman married to the pastor, as well as all of the opportunities for Christian service and the blessings that come with this ministry. There is nothing quite like the happiness that I feel when I attend the worship when the people of God are being edified, knowing that I contributed to that. The satisfaction of seeing adults who were children under our ministry, bringing their children to church to be presented and taught in the church us incomparable. I wouldn’t trade anything for the privilege of holding the hand of the believer who is ready to leave this world to take up residence in heaven, or of comforting those in mourning, to listening to the stories of the elderly, advising young people in dating and then see them in a happy marriage , kneeling to pray with the newly converted, or seeing problems solved with prayer. It is an untold blessing to know that so many in the church are offering prayers for my ministry! To see a growing church, maturing believers, multiplying ministries and feel that my ministry to the minister facilitates this, is extremely rewarding. All this is the magnificent part of being married to the pastor.

The Wonder Woman Syndrome

Unfortunately, there are some few parts in ministry that are not so magnificent. Those are the challenging, the miserable moments. I believe that one of the causes of this misery is when people identify the pastor's wife as the "church's wife." It is a case of mistaken identity. She loses her identity as a person, trying to fulfill a role in which everyone has an opinion of what she should be or do. Someone wrote a joke about it, in the form of a classified ad:

HELP WANTED: Position - Pastor's Wife

Qualifications: soloist and chorister, pianist, children's Sunday School teacher, youth leader, leader of the women's ministry group, director of the special programs of the church (Christmas , Easter, etc.). Knows the Bible by heart, keeps her home impeccable, hosts other pastors and missionaries at home, prepares tea, dinner, lunch for various groups and organizations of the Church, is an exemplary mother with angelic children, acts as a driver for events outside of the church, is able to preach on special occasions, and takes care of the spiritual, emotional, and physical life of her husband. She should be a smiling extrovert, a peace-maker, and ready to work 24 hours a day with problematic, confused and demanding people.
Salary: $ 0.

As a joke, it's all right to laugh! If, however, this is the harsh reality for pastor's wives, you should cry. The woman who is married to the pastor is called, as any Christian woman is, to help her husband, to have intimacy with God, be obedient to Him, let the Holy Spirit develop fruit in her life, study the Word, use her spiritual gifts and talents to the building up of the people of God, be part of the Body of Christ, and witness to Jesus Christ. She is not called to be part of a "package deal" in which the church can have two workers for one salary! She is called to be the woman that God wants her to be!

Many women suffer from the syndrome of trying to be Wonder Woman, but perhaps the wife of the pastor is more tempted to do so. The people of the church believe that she has to know everything that the church is doing, everything that the pastor thinks, has to be present at all meetings and activities, take a thousand and one positions in the church and also maintain a happy family and a beautiful home, in addition to working to supplement the family income. This is the perfect recipe for a nervous breakdown.

Although the wife of the pastor has a ministry to the minister, she should only try to do that what God wants her to do, just like any other member of the Church. I confess that this is not easy for me. My tendency is to try to do everything, because I want to please people. I want the approval of all. I want to be praised. I want to be just as respected as the former pastor’s wives. But that is not a worthy motivation to performing tasks in the church. My need for acceptance and my fear of saying no, is simply the sin of fearing men more than God. Along with Peter I have to learn to say "I must obey God rather than men" (Acts 5.29). I have a duty to teach others this same obedience to God, through my example.

Before coming to the church where we now serve, I felt that I should not accept any position or commitment for at least a year. To be obedient to God, I was obliged to say “no” many times, and suffered in doing so. Although I explained the reason, not everyone understood. It has been a new experience for me to admit that I am not Wonder Woman. For the first time in my life I do have enough time to study the Bible, pray, talk to my husband and take care of my body. I have realized that it is just not worth the effort trying to be Wonder Woman, but it is wonderful trying to be everything that God wants me to be.

Friend of All, Friend of None

Over the years several pastor's wives have advised me to be friends with all women of the church, but to take no one to be my friend, nor to open my heart to church members. It was hard to hear that, because my friends have always been members of my church. I feared I would have to live a life of solitude, with no friends. I doubted the validity of this advice, but I have discovered that it is sound. Even though I know it is true, that doesn't make it any easier to deal with this reality in such a way that it does not generate an unbearable loneliness in my life.

I, like other women, I need friends. In the first years of our marriage, I worked outside the home and my friends were co-workers. When I moved to Canada, I missed my friends. I was in a country and church where I knew no one. My husband has always been and always will be my best friend and that helped. I even adopted a cat (who bore the arabic name Sadik, that means friend), but nevertheless I wanted a friend like Jonathan, who "knitted his soul to the soul of David" (1Samuel 18.1). I asked God for this friend. In time, God sent me several friends. Some were from other churches in my town. I enrolled in a Bible study for wives of pastors of the city. It was exactly what I needed because I found a group where I could share openly. Currently I am taking art classes and this group (attended by other Christians and also pastor’s wives) has been a great outlet. It's very nice to be simply "Peggy" to this group.

The key for me has been to be patient and let God choose the right friends for me. I have seen that while waiting for God to send me friends, I can grow spiritually. I have discovered that God really is quite sufficient for my emotional needs.

Living in the Fish Bowl

On the very same Sunday, I had two people make particularly unpleasant comments to me. One women commented that I should not have cut my hair, and she did not like the color. A man contributed immensely to my self-esteem by noting how much weight I had gained. Made for a great Sunday! Honestly? I was mad and asked myself why they thought they had the right to share an opinion that I did not ask for! Many church members think they have a right to comment on my appearance, my way of speaking (especially my accent), as well as what I do and don’t do. Worse, I have no right to retaliate, because I am the wife of the church’s “angel”.

The paradox of being an easy target for criticism and being on a pedestal at the same time is slightly weird, but it is unavoidable for the pastor's wife because her life is being observed by everyone. In some ways, she is a public figure(on a much smaller scale), like politicians or actors. Although it is difficult to accept, many people do not see the pastor’s wife as a real person. Therefore, they feel they have the right to treat her in a way they would never ever treat their family or friends. It is unfortunate, but it happens. For example, one pastor's wife told me that a church member came into her house, opened the refrigerator, took out yogurt and said: "This is mine, because I paid for it with my tithe." Ouch! Events like these give the pastor’s wife the impression that she is living in a fish bowl, with her whole life open for perusal.

There is nothing we can do to change this mentality, but there is much we can do to deal with it. In fact, any situation is only 10% what actually happens, and 90% how we react to the event. How then can we live, and live well, in our glass house?By learning how to "react" to our fish bowl existence.

A pastor's wife once gave me some advice that has helped me. She said that we have to develop a "thick skin", but maintain a "soft heart." What dids he mean? Simply, we can not let the arrows or the darts of criticism and defamation penetrate and hurt us. Instead we must act as Paul instructed: "When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure it; when we are slandered, we answer kindly. " (1 Cor 4.11b-12 a). I confess that this is not my first reaction. But as the old saying goes “people who live in glass house shouldn’t throw stones”. Each time I react "in the flesh", by throwing stones, my glass house is damaged.

We cannot, however, allow the thick skin, to harden our heart, Shutting down to protect ourselves emotionally is never healthy. My husband is helping me with that, teaching me that I have the opportunity to discover how I can love these difficult people with the love of Jesus Christ. I am called to love, not to hate, and that even includes the person who tells me I am fat.

Recently God has taught me that I do not have to be controlled by the criticism or praise of others. It is a liberating discovery! I can never let the fear, nor the praise, be more important than fear of God. Jesus criticized the Pharisees because they "loved the glory of men more than the glory of God" (John 12.43), so I have to be careful not to be more afraid of men than of God. Walking in the spirit maintains my glass house is all in one piece.

Shepherdless Sheep
Some colleagues have shared with me that they feel like sheep without a shepherd, because they cannot see their husband as their own pastor. I confess that I never shared these sentiments, but I can fully understand how this happens.

The wife of a senior pastor told me once that I needed to be a “lightening rod”, listening to the problems of my husband and of the church without sharing with anyone. Frankly, I cannot agree,as I generally share everything with my husband. It is true that I hear some things that do not repeat to my husband, because it wouldn’t edify anyone.If I feel the need to unburden, I look for someone extremely trustworthy with whom I can share. I am not invincible and am not called to "suffer in silence".

I have always treated my husband as my pastor. When I have a biblical or theological question, I talk to him. I ask him to help me in the preparation of my studies. I ask for his advice and prayer when I'm down or scared. I feel well-fed on Sundays during his sermons. I respect his leadership in the church. I feel more like the most blessed member of the church because my pastor-husband is always nearby.If you are unable to see your husband as your pastor, pray for God to change your heart, and take away any word of criticism or disrespect for your husband.

When, however, I feel a little neglected, or overloaded, I try to avoid the role of martyr (not always 100% successful), explaining how I'm feeling. It is not easy to be completely rational in those times (the tears are inevitable), but at least he knows what I'm feeling. I see no advantage in hiding what is really going on inside of me. On the other hand, I try to be understanding when he has a rough week, picking up the slack and knowing that he will do the same for me.

If you feel that your husband is not taking care of you, nor himself, you may have to take a stronger stance and urge him to do more exercise, take more rest, eat healthily, spend more time with the family and arrange a time for "dating "you. Doing so, you will be acting as the pastor of your pastor.

Decrease so he can Increase

One day, after completing a certain task in the church, some people were surprised I was capable enough to do that. That devastated me, so I later called a friend, commenting that the people at church did not see me as a capable person, they didn’t understand who I really am, blah, blah, blah. I finished off the conversation complaining: "I used to really be somebody." She (a pastor's wife as well) sighed and agreed she often felt the same way. I began thinking a lot about this difficulty of living in the shadow of my husband. After much prayer, I came to the conclusion that "I" was the real problem. Not my huband. Not even the church members. I was living an "ego-driven" life.

My ego is a hungry beast always needing food. If I'm not very careful, it takes over everything I do. While psychologists talk about the importance of "self-esteem," God speaks about humility. If Jesus himself took the form of a servant, who am I to be different? That sounds good, but it is not so easy. In fact, when the Kingdom of God is truly sovereign in my heart, my desire is to serve and not be served, honor and not be honored, love and not be loved, give and not receive.Mostly, however, I want my own way, my own desires met, to be the queen bee. My call is to give up "my personal kingdom", where my ego is well fed, to be mere servant of God Almighty.

I confess that this is my biggest challenge in ministry. John the Baptist has become my example in how to do this. I think often of how he had fame and recognition, but never ever promoted his ministry. He always put Jesus first. My flesh, my ego, prefers to receive affection and attention through praise, recognition, fame, awards, etc.. I have to be careful not to use the ministry of my husband as a way of feeding my own ego All I do in ministry must point to Jesus, not to me or even to my husband. It is necessary that Jesus increases, and that I diminish. I think this will be a constant battle in my life. My prayer is that by the end of my good fight as a pastor’s wife I can say with Paul: " I have been crucified with Christ and I no longer live, but Christ lives in me. The life I live in the body, I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave himself for me." (Galatians 2.20).

Chapter Twelve of Cats are Cool

My Little Rule Breakers

Ka-boom! I heard a noise in the living room and I went running. The clock was on the floor and a stack of books from the bookshelves, had also fallen to the floor. There were magazines scattered around the room. It looked like the room had been hit by an earthquake. I began to call my cats: “Baby, Dolly”. Neither of the cats appeared. They seemed to have disappeared from our house. When I paid close attention, however, I saw that the curtains were a little odd. Upon opening the curtains, I saw two very innocent looking cats staring up at me, as if to say “What on the earth is wrong?”
Although I fully realize that Dolly and Baby are only cats, I have no doubt that they understood, from my tone of voice, that they were in trouble. That’s why they hid behind the curtains.
Something I find fascinating is that the two of them always hide out when they break something or do something they shouldn’t. For example, the two of them are prohibited from jumping up on the dining room table. If, however, I come up on them, very quietly, early morning or during the night, it’s highly likely that I will see two cats sleeping on the table. When they see or hear me, they jump down and run as fast as they can for the opposite corner of the room.
In the same way that Dolly and Baby try to hide their misbehaviour, we try the same thing. No one ever really likes to admit they are wrong, or did something they should not have done. No one finds any pleasure in saying: “I was wrong”, “I was disobedient”. We are ashamed or embarrassed by our wrong-doing. We are afraid of being humiliated or punished.
It’s really hard, I mean REALLY hard, to speak the truth when we are wrong. Our instinct is always to proclaim our innocence: “It wasn’t ME” or “I didn’t do it” or “It’s not my fault”. Others may believe your lie when you say you are innocent, but there is someone who knows that you are not speaking the truth.
God hears all that you say. God knows all you do. God desires for you to always speak the truth, even when it is difficult. God desires for you to act with honesty and courage.
The next time you are tempted to deny your guilt, remember that God wants you to speak the truth. Think: “Am I acting like Baby and Dolly, or am I acting like a child of God?”

Sushi Time

Just to let you know I am still around, thought I'd do a short entry on my birthday yesterday. I thought and thought about what I would do, as being on a Sunday, there's not too much time for activities. But at least we could eat out. So I decided to brave and make an unusual choice. I would try sushi. Since I am on a campaign to eat healthily, even my birthday is no excuse to "fall off the wagon". So I researched and found a recommended restaurant not too far from home and church. I figure, cheap sushi you do NOT want. Sissy was my consultant and fortunately the menu came with photos. I learned that sushi are the rolls and sashimi are the strips of raw fish. I definitely like the sushi a lot better. The photo to the right shows some of the sushi and the tuna sashimi. To the left is a "house" speciality where we went and is really very good. I like everything a lot, except the tuna sashimi, which didn't settle well with me. Sissy agreed.
As for my poor sweet husband, he suffered along, ordering a ramen like dish, which he was surprised to admit was very good and filling. I thought I would be hungry very soon afterwards, but surprisingly the food actually was filling. And just think I was full without consuming many calories. Of course I sort of ruined it by eating some orange strips covered in dark chocolate as a dessert, when I got home. My husband gave just a couple as a treat, for my birthday, and they were really delicious.
It is sort of strange having a birthday on Sunday, as you get lots of hugs and well wishers. Usually, however, my phone rings off the hook all day with greetings, but this year no cards, no calls. I guess everyone knew they would see me at church.
I received a beautiful (live) orchid plant from the church, which I hope to keep alive a long time. I LOVE orchids.
João, with a little help from Sissy, gave me a just perfect dress purse. So unique! And some tropical soaps I have been admiring from afar for a long time (Have you ever had cherry soap? Or passion fruit? Haven't lived yet!) Elly also gave me a great new purse, that is very in style. Is someone trying to tell me that just because I haven't bought a new purse in over 10 years I am out of style????
Try new things. That's my motto for now. Stay in tune with contemporary culture. Grow older without growing OLD. That should carry me through my 56th year.
By the way I am coming along on my writing. I turned in one chapter on Friday and today I should finish the second one. Yipee!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Chapter Eleven of Cats Are Cool

I may not have much time in the next two weeks to write much, as I have two chapters of a book on Women in Ministry that are due. There was some confusion as to the due date, so all of the sudden I am very far behind schedule and have to turn in the chapters early next week. That means my blog will probably be quiet for a while. This entry was basically ready, so I am putting it online. No time for photos, however! Wish me luck finishing up my other writing. See you soon...

Ants and Cats Don’t Mix

My house in Brazil had a peculiar problem. Somewhere there was an ant’s nest that we couldn’t find, with the result that I had ants everywhere in the house. The ants even ate through the cement that held my tiles on the walls. If there was even a crumb of food left around, the whole area was black. And these weren’t ordinary ants. They were the kind that bite and sting. More than once I ended up hollering bloody murder when they bit my finger or toes. I had to be really careful to put everything away. Unfortunately, this was a problem for Baby and Dolly. Perhaps you know that cats like to eat a little bit at a time, so you always leave their food out. The ants thought this was just great. It was a wonderful food supply for them. When my cats tried to eat, the ants stung them and they jumped back. Soon they were afraid to eat and began to lose weight.

I had to come up with some kind of solution, but nothing seemed to work, until I remembered that the ants hate water. So I put their cat food in a deep bowl and then set it down inside another bowl filled with water. If the ants tried to get to the food, they had to “swim” in the water. Of course they drowned trying and I had solved the problem. The solution to the ant problem, created another one. Baby and Dolly had long been accustomed to eating out of the same bowl at the same time. This new bowl was deep, but not wide and only one cat could eat at a time. Where there are two hungry cats, watch out!

Since Baby was the biggest, he quickly ran to eat, but Dolly didn’t sit by patiently waiting to eat. She quickly stuck in her paw to pull out some food. (Strangely enough, that is how Dolly likes to eat. She usually picks up the ration and eats it out of her paw.) That irritated Baby who began to growl and before you knew what was really happening, the two of them were fighting. Several times their fighting over the food caused the dish to tip over into the water, which made the food spoil. If I didn’t notice it right away, the two of them went a long time without food.

It seemed as if Baby was thinking something like: “If Dolly gets food, then I lose!” Dolly happened to be thinking the same thing. So they both lost and went hungry. Sometimes it seemed like we were going to have an eternal fight between them. They reminded me of an athlete I heard talking once. She said; “I don’t go into any championship in order to lose. The only thing that counts is winning.” For her there are only two things that happen in a competition. One person wins and the other person loses. That athlete was thinking just like Baby and Dolly.

I, however, think differently. I think that two people can win or two can lose. In the case of my cats, when they fought over the food, both of them ended up losing.

Just to prove my cats are not stupid, they eventually worked out a solution. Now Baby eats first, which makes sense because he is very chubby and is always hungry. While he is chewing his food, Dolly puts her paw into the dish, takes out some pieces of cat food and spreads it around on the ground. She then picks up a piece at a time and eats it as she wishes, while Baby sticks his head down in the dish. The two of them learned to cooperate with another, each waiting their turn. Both of them end up winning, because they can eat as much as they want, without fighting. It is a win-win situation.

If cats can learn to cooperate, why can’t people? Instead of fighting over who is winning or who won the game, why not just have fun and enjoy playing with your friends. Instead of insisting on being first in line, why can’t everyone wait their turn? Instead of having to be right and have things your way, why can’t everyone work together for the best solution to a problem? The Bible teaches us that we “co-workers” together with God (1 Corinthians 3:9). Why can’t we just try cooperating more and competing less? I always find it a lot more fun to be with people who cooperate than with a group of grumpy people who are always fighting. That must be much more pleasing to God’s eyes as well.

Chapter Ten of Cats Are Cool

Special Friends

It wasn’t easy, for Baby was not enchanted with his little sister, Dolly, but gradually he did learn to accept her. Not only did he learn to accept her, but the two of them became inseparable. Dolly was so relieved. Not only because Baby stopped beating her up, but because she had been lonely at our house. Soon Baby began to clean Dolly with her tongue (a sure sign of friendship between cats) and Dolly began to curl up and sleep in Baby’s arms. One day I even saw Dolly cleaning Baby. Wow the two of them had come a long way. The two of them even worked out a system of eating together without fighting.

I began to notice that Baby thought Dolly was his baby kitty. He watched over her and even seemed to protect her. One day Dolly was able to squeeze out of a window we had left partially opened. She was so small it wasn’t too hard for her, but of course the ever chubby Baby wouldn’t begin to fit. He ran to me and began to cry and cry. He would walk away and then back to me and cry. I finally got the idea he wanted something, so I followed him to the front door. I found Dolly on the other side of the door, crying to get back inside. What a good babysitter he turned out to be.

The two of them run all over the house together. The both sleep together in the same chair. When Dolly had surgery, the vet said she should be separated from Baby because he might accidentally hurt her, since she was still groggy. I put her in a special bed in the bathroom where she could sleep in peace. Baby cried and cried. The next morning when I went to check on her, I found Baby sleeping by her side, protecting her again. Somehow he had climbed to a window that led to the bathroom and pushed on the window until he got it open and crawled in to be at her side.

With so much love, Dolly has really grown. She is taller than Baby now. Of course, with so much special care, you could expect such growth. She has a safe house to live in. She has food. She has a special “body-guard” and she gets a lot of love.

That kind of reminds me of my church. I’ll explain. Dolly grew and is healthy because she had just the right ingredients. People in my church also grow because of the right ingredients. For instance, Dolly needs food. Christians also need food to grow spiritually. That food is what we call spiritual food. It is things like Bible study, sermons, worship services, discipleship classes, all that help a person understand more about God. When someone understands and acts more and more like God wants, we say that this person is growing spiritually.

Another thing that helps Dolly to grow are the games she plays with Baby, and the special friendship they share. People in church also need the attention of other church members. New Christians in the church need that kind of friendship in a special way. When someone new arrives at church, they are happier and more willing to return when others treat them kindly, like a friend. People in church should be friends. If the folks at church are fighting, or just don’t care about each other, you can be sure that church won’t grow. Just like Baby accepts and treats Dolly with respect and love, so people at church should treat one another.

Now I have a question for you. Are you helping your church grow? Are you growing spiritually by participating in Bible study and worship and other activities? Are you being a friend to others? Are you praying for the other members of your church? Is there someone in your church that you can help? I hope you are being a wonderful friend to others in your church, like Baby is being a wonderful friend to Dolly.

When Sin Gets Personal

In the aftermath of 9/11, many religious leaders (including Anne Graham Lotz) made statements about America suffering punishment for their many sins, that included things like taking prayer out of schools, acceptance of homosexuality, etc. That, in fact, is NOT good theology, because if a country's sin were the cause of God's punishment, then countries like Sudan would have been blasted off the face of the earth, or even Brazil with all their carnality and idolatry would have bombed as well. That doesn't mean I don't believe that 9/11 was NOT the result of sin, or even the consequence of sin, but I don't believe that God killed those 2000 people to send a telegram to Americans to put prayer in public schools! Nor do I believe we can make an analogy between Biblical Israel and America. Israel was the nation-elect, the people God chose. America is anything but that.
What is so ironic to me is that so far I haven't heard a single preacher talking about America's punishment with this recent financial crisis that is being faced. Haven't heard too much on personal moral failure lately. Have heard some on how to cope with the financial crisis. I think I know why. It's about personal sin, not about some collective failure or sin we can blame on the legislature or the "heathens" or other groups, so we don't feel to comfortable pointing the finger at anyone when it points at us too.
Today, as I read in the book of Isaiah, it was like the the words popped out at me - this is what is happening right now. Isaiah 5:8-9 says: "Woe to you who add house to house and join field to field till no space is left and you live alone in the land. The LORD Almighty has declared in my hearing: "Surely the great houses will become desolate, the fine mansions left without occupants." Seems like unmitigated greed is not a good thing.
Hum... now how might that apply to America's current crisis? Now let's see? Why in the world does any human being need the kind of space that many American families posses? Why in the world is it necessary to acquire the kind of debt that many American's have? Could it be GREED? Could wanting more than you can afford possibly be a sin? Could it be saying that most Americans don't believe God isn't all sufficient and they need something more? Nah... couldn't be that. It's just the great American dream - I can have it all. Or is it?
Maybe there is a price to be paid for spending what we don't have. Maybe the financial crisis all of America faces is the result of personal sin. Maybe we religious leaders have failed when we have not called our people to task for a sin so often condemned in God's word. Maybe I too am guilty of this same sin when I casually say "put in on my VISA", when I don't need "it", but I WANT it.
Oops, getting too personal there.
I have watched and sometimes worried and sometimes been very sad at seeing the debacle that is happening in the US banks. What I have not done is pray to be more holy. I have not prayed for repentance for my nation and for an uprising of Christian leaders who say that this ridiculously luxurious lifestyle MUST stop. Nor have I been willing to say that I and many others are suffering for the sin of greed and its horrible consequences and taking many innocents in its wake. The sin is personal. The results are global.
And that's my sermon for the week.

Chapter Nine of Cats Are Cool

Baby Gets a Sister

Baby was creating quite a problem at our house. He REALLY hated being alone. When I left for work in the morning, he followed me to the door and then he began to bite me at the heels. In fact, whenever we got ready to leave him, he became quite aggressive, biting us. It was beginning to worry us. Obviously he was unhappy about being alone, but we couldn’t stay home all the time, just to be with him.
One day my husband and I came home with a big box. Inside the box, was supposed to be the solution to our problem with Baby. When I walked in the door, I sat the box on the floor. As usual, Baby was waiting for us. When Baby saw the box and what was inside of it, he lost interest in us. He began to examine the box and its contents with a thoroughness I had never seen. He sniffed. He looked. He got close. He backed off. He cried a little. He acted absolutely terrified and was very nervous.
You probably have already guessed what was inside the box. It was Baby’s new little sister. She was a small white cat, with black patches all over her body. She was ten weeks old, just the right age to be Baby’s little sister. Her name was Dolly. She was so small and scared to be in this new house. All she wanted was to be loved and cared for. On Baby’s part, nothing doing! It was definitely hate at first sight.
I was so disappointed. I thought that he would be thrilled to have another cat to keep him company. I should have known there would be problems. After all, Baby hadn’t been around cats very much. Remember, he was abandoned by his mother and raised by a dog. Poor Baby just didn’t know what to do with another cat. Dolly wasn’t a dog and wasn’t a human, so what was she? He decided very quickly that she was the ENEMY! He was terrified of her, but determined to be rid of her as soon as possible.
During the first few hours, Baby didn’t exactly get close to Dolly. He circled her, he smelled her scent, but he didn’t touch her. He just wasn’t sure what to do with her. He soon began to growl and arch his back. He didn’t take long before he attacked. He quickly reached out his paw and gave her a good swipe across the nose. Dolly simply cowered in the corner. Soon we began to think we would have to change her name to Scar-Face.
Baby just wouldn’t accept Dolly because he was afraid of her, because he wanted to defend his own territory and because he just didn’t know what to do with another cat. He actually was showing prejudice. He didn’t know what she was, so he rejected her.
We sometimes do exactly the same thing. When someone has skin a different color, speaks another language or even has different habits than we do, we may feel curious, but we may also reject them. In most cases we don’t growl or scratch them, but we may tell a joke, make fun of them, or simply snub them as a friend. Sometimes we may even demonstrate fear when a person is really different.
The Bible teaches us that “if you show favoritism, you sin”. That means that you treat people differently based on appearances. And that is prejudice – forming on opinion about someone without really knowing him. That’s how Baby acted when he met Dolly. I felt kind of ashamed when I remember the times I had rejected someone that I didn’t yet know. I am, after all, a person who can think before I act, different from a cat!
Things got so bad between the two of them, that I couldn’t leave them alone. Dolly slept and ate in a room that was separated from Baby’s. Too bad, for Baby was missing out on a lot of fun and some very good company. Still, I couldn’t very well force him to be Dolly’s friend. God doesn’t force me to treat people fairly, but he does help me to conquer my prejudices. Why don’t you look around and see if there isn’t someone near you who needs a friend? Hopefully you can be different than Baby!

Nature at its best

This weekend I was in Espírito Santo to speak at the Baptist Women's Camp. I hadn't been back to speak at one of their events for over 10 years. My very first field of service in Brazil was in Espírito Santo, but I left there over 20 years ago. I was pleased to see several very old and dear friends, sad to know many others were no longer living or well enough to be active. Time does march on! When they asked the women who remembered me, there were few at the camp who did. I consider that a very good sign, because most of the women at the camp were far too young to remember someone who led the work 25 years ago. The Baptist camp was little changed, although some upgrades had been made here and there. I was especially happy that we hot showers and electricity after 10 PM! Definitely a big improvement!
I had worked very hard to get ready for the four messages. Since I don't do much speaking anymore, it seems I am out of practice so it took more time than ever to prepare the messages. One of the hardest parts is deciding on what Scripture passage and what message to preach. That was a challenge with the theme presented to me. It had to do with the centenniel of Baptist women, together with the challenge of reaching new generations.
I had my afternoon free on Saturday, so I enjoyed the nature at the camp, which is smack dab on a mountain range. It was very cool, since we are just into spring here. When I get out of the asphalt jungle I live in, I am glad to see green. I thought I would share the photo of the banana tree (isn't it beautiful?), the lagoon at the camp (sorry the swans wouldn't cooperate to get in the photo), and the azaleas. Now the big question... do you know what fruit I photographed on the left photo? I know, but do you? I am so sorry they weren't in season as I love them! I have also thrown in a photo of a green coconut, on a palm tree, just so you would know what they look like. They have an organic garden at the camp and we enjoyed lots of vegetables fresh from the garden. Some you would recognize, others would be foreign to you.
On Saturday night we had out "blow out" party to celebrate the 100 years of our Woman's Missionary Union in Brazil. I am posing with one of the young women at the camp. Isn't it great that our women's work there isn't just lol (little old ladies in tennis shoes)?
I had lots of talks with old friends and made a number of new friends. I had forgotten how very warm and friendly the folks of Espírito Santo really are. Made me homesick for those days.
It was a great experience and I am thrilled I had it. It's good to have old memories and make new ones too.

Chapter Eight of Cats are Cool

Baby, the Sheep

“Run, Baby! It’s our car.” And there goes Baby streaking down the steps like a bullet to arrive at the front door before his “master”, my husband gets there.

He is so cute, because it’s just about the only time he moves really fast. Baby likes to lie around, especially close by me. When I am working on the computer, he likes to lie in my lap, or in the chair right beside me. When I’m not home, he lies right on my husband’s feet. The thing he hates most in the world is when we are both gone. When we leave, he follows us to door, tries to go with us and when he can’t, he jumps up onto the windowsill and watches us leaving, crying the whole time. As soon as we get home, he is at the door, doing his little “coming home” dance.

One of the things we noticed is that Baby knows the sound of our car. When any other car comes up the hill where we live, he could care less. He only budges when he is sure it is our car. I don’t know how he does it. For a short time, one of the neighbors had a car just like ours. Whenever I heard it, I was sure it was my husband coming in the driveway. Not Baby. When he heard that car, he would lift his head, cock his ears, then lie back down. The sound may have fooled me, but not Baby. He only runs downstairs to the front door when it is our car.

Sometimes, when the house was all closed up, with the air conditioning on, and Baby was sound asleep, I would be startled to see him jump up and go to the door. I didn’t know why until I heard my husband calling out his greetings a few minutes later. I didn’t hear a thing, but Baby did. He knows the sound of our car and when we are arriving home.

Jesus said in John 10:14: “"I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me.” (NIV) The shepherd cares for his sheep and the sheep know the shepherd’s voice. That’s like Baby. We take care of him and he knows us. He can distinguish the sound of our car from all the other cars on our street.

Jesus doesn’t really talk to sheep, however. He’s talking about his followers, those people who believe in Him. He’s comparing himself to the shepherd and the Christians to the sheep. The Christians love and know Jesus, like the sheep love and know their shepherd. Jesus cares for the Christians like the shepherd cares for the sheep. The sheep know their shepherd, so the Christian should know Jesus.

How can the Christian know Jesus? There are a lot of ways. How does the sheep know the shepherd, or how did Baby get to recognize the sound of our car? By spending time together and association. That is to say, Baby paid attention to the sound of our car every time we arrived, because that was important to him. He waited and listened for us. After so many times, it just became easier and easier for Baby to recognize the sound of our car.

We can spend time with Jesus by reading the Bible, which is one way he “talks” to us. We can spend time with Jesus talking to him, through our prayers. We can even learn more about Jesus through classes and worship services at our church. The more time we spend with Him, the better we get to know him and the more our friendship grows.

So, how well do you know Jesus? Would you like to know Him better? Go for it! Just like Baby knows us well, we can know Jesus well and feel like He is our best friend.

Every time I see Baby at the door, waiting for me to come in and play with him, I am reminded of the fact that Jesus is waiting for me to spend time with him. Baby is my “sheep” waiting for me to care for him, and I am Jesus’ sheep that cares for me. Works out nicely, don’t you think?

The Black Hole Where Socks Go

I bet you didn't know we also have a black hole where missing socks go, here in Brazil! I know we do in the US and in Canada. I attributed it to the use of dryers there, thinking that the dryers eat socks, but I don't use a dryer here. Occasionally João's socks go missing in action. Last time I was in the US I bought him an expensive pair of socks (dumb thing to do) to go with an odd colored suit he has. Of course that was one of the socks to go missing. He has one, but not the other one. I looked all over the house, behind the washing machine, in his other drawers, in my sock drawer, etc. But no olive green sock. Sunday he wore a new suit, that is about the same color and I lamented that we didn't have his nice, but missing, sock to wear. (By the way, isn't this fascinating reading all about my husband's wardrobe?)
Today, an odd thing happened as I pulled out a pair of pants to wear. I haven't had them on for a couple of months. As I was walking down the hall, I felt something swinging. I looked around and I had a tail. Yes, an olive green tail. Yes, this is the tale of a tail. But now I come to the tail-end of my tale of a tail. It was his missing SOCK stock to the velcro on the back pocket of my pants. Just had to share my discovery. A real miracle. A missing sock was found. I didn't throw a party, but I did laugh for a long time. The Black Hole where socks go lost out this time.

A Sunday to Remember

Sunday was a historic, memorable day in the life of our church. It was the installation (induction) of our youth minister. He is our second minister at our church, our music minister having come in February. You can see him seated to the left of João. I forgot to take pictures, or I was involved in the most moving parts of the service, so I didn't get many photos. This photo shows the president of the seminary, who preached at the service. There were many touching elements during the worship service. The whole service was based around the theme of God's sovereignty, which was important as a basis for ministry. It was a very worshipful experience, as contrasted with a mere formality. We sang contemporary, but beautiful music and one of our young adult groups sang. When we called all the youth up to the front for a commitment, there must have been about 300 or people. We commented that his flock of youth is bigger than many churches!
Two especially moving moments were when his father prayed, the whole church on their knees and Junior (yes, it does seem appropriate that a youth minister would be a "junior") slightly inclined is head on his father's shoulder. His father is also a pastor. His father's prayer was very moving. At the end of the service, Junior and his lovely wife, Juliana, spoke a few words and they were well thought out and I felt very appropriate when they both read their commitment to the ministry, based on God's word. It was very meaningful to us all and the church is very happy, as they already know and love Junior, who has been the chaplain of our school for about two years.
Just to add some fun into the mix, we had a baby presentation service. That is done a little differently here in Brazil. It usually happens the first time a baby comes to church, and there is no previous planning. It is just a spontaneous event. We give a Bible to the family, a letter for the child to read when she/he turns 12. João holds the baby and prays for the family. Sometimes there is one than one baby, so I get to hold one. Once we actually had TWO sets of twins on the same Sunday. Now we all had our hands full that day.
To close our service, João called up all our ministers and directors of departments, as well as the coordinators, to "install" them for another year of service. There are 12 in all, but only one was really new, as that was the new coordinator for Religious Education. His father also prayed for him in this task. The young man who accepted the position (volunteer) is a third year seminary student, and grew up in our church. I couldn't get everyone in the photo from where I was sitting, but you can see in the photo, from right to left Youth minister (Junior), Music Minister (Eduardo), Evangelism and Missions (Marcelo), Administration (Fauzita, full time position), Deacons (Mario), Religious Education (Felix).
You can imagine it was a rather long service... lasting almost two hours. (Good luck to our communications department that has to reduce the service down to one hour for our weekly radio program.) Still, we all left gloriously happy. It was, for sure, a Sunday to remember!

Chapter Seven of Cats are Cool

Baby Takes a Bath

Poor Baby! He was so little and underfed when he came to me. He had been abandoned by his mother when he was just 10 days old. He survived by nursing a dog. I knew I needed to take him to a vet to have him checked out. He wasn’t crazy about the experience. When we got home, he wouldn't even get near me. He was very upset.

Little did he know that worse was to come. The vet had given him a prescription for his ear infection and some pills for worms and some liquid vitamins. Twice a day I had to put Baby on my lap, open his mouth and put the medicine in. I also had to put a creme in his ears. Me oh my, how Baby hated that. He tried to run from me, he scratched me and even tried to bite me. He got smart and would hold the pill in his mouth and then spit it out when I put him down. Did he ever make trouble for me. I tried to explain to him that it was for his own good, but he just didn’t listen.

Still something more awful awaited the two of us. He needed a bath, not just to clean him up, but to help get rid of his fleas. Generally cats hate baths. Baby really hated baths. I put on a raincoat and gloves. I brought Baby into the bathroom and locked the door. I talked gently to him. I had the water just the right temperature and it was a nice hot day. What a disaster. You can’t believe how strong a kitten of 1 ½ pounds can really be. Baby got his bath (and so did I).

Now he was really put out with me. In fact, I thought he would never forgive me. He sought solace with my husband. That just shows how upset he was. He couldn’t understand that I did all that because I cared about him. He didn’t know that without all those things he would never really be healthy. To save his life, I had to suffer his scratches and growls and anger. I did it for his own good.

It’s really like that for us too. At times we have to take some medicine to help us get well, but we complain the whole time. We also get irritated when our parents make us go to bed early when we would like to stay up all night. We need to sleep for our health. Our teachers at school give us assignments and homework so that we can learn.

Even more than doctors, parents and teachers, God knows what is best for us. He gave us rules, in the Bible, to live by. We need to obey Him for own good. It really is for our own, in the same way all the things I did to Baby were for his own health. At times the things God wants us to do, like loving our enemy or being totally honest, are just as hard for us, as taking a bath was for Baby. While I might accidentally make a mistake in the treatment of Baby, but God never makes a mistake. We can always be sure that God is too good to be unkind and too wise to be mistaken.

Happy Birthday Dear Mia

Suco da Luz do Sol

Sunshine Juice! It's all the rage here in Brazil. After seeing it on a news program, we decided to get a juice extractor and try it out. If you haven't heard about it, or it's not all the popular in your area, here are all the details you need to make it yourself. First you need to "germinate" some kind of nut or seed. I used sunflower seeds. You can see how they are germinated on the right. Then you need to clean your fresh fruits and veggies. The recipe calls for an apple, a cucumber, fresh mint, a very green leafy veggie (I used kale and found it bitter, but found spinach very nice), a carrot (or another root like beets or ginger, but I found ginger a bit too pungent for me), a vegetable (I have used chayote-chocho, squash and broccoli) and the sprouted seeds. I have added a few slices of melon to make it slightly sweeter.
You blend them all together in your blender and then you have to use a sieve and cheesecloth, etc. to strain the pulp. Me, I prefer the juice extractor. You don't even have to core or peel the veggies. God bless the store clerk you suggested putting a plastic bag in the pulp collector, because otherwise you have a huge mess of nasty pulp that sticks to the sides of the collector cup. With the garbage bag on the side you just lift it out and throw away the pulp. Of course, that seems a waste and we are trying to figure out how to use it, since we can't very well compost up here. I am amazed at the quantity of juice that is comes out. And it is so green. Only the carrot throws in another color.
I expected the juice to be kind of thick and chunky. Since I am so sensitive to textures, I was afraid that I would be revolted by that, but surprisingly, it is not thick. It is like any other juice. The apple and carrot (and with a little bit of melon) make it quite sweet. They say not the refrigerate the ingredients, but I do, since I hate anything lukewarm. Both João and I were quite apprehensive about how it would taste and so we both kind of had to work up some courage to actually do a taste test. I don't think we are too used to drinking anything green, although I don't know why that is so. Frankly I wouldn't say it's the most delicious juice I have ever tasted, but in it's own unique way, it's kind of good. I have tweaked the recipe some and tried to make it more palatable for us. That may not meet up to the standards of the LifeFood people. This juice comes from the raw food movement, called Lifefood. Me, I like everything well cooked, but I do know it loses vitamins in cooking. I also know I am not very patient to make and eat salads. So I figure this juice is a way of getting a good portion of the fruits and vegetables we need each day. Surprisingly the health clinics here in Brazil are recommending this juice to lower cholesterol and blood pressure and to lose weight. I know nothing is a panacea, but this little drink actually is very filling. So much so, that I am not hungry for hours and hours afterwards. I sure would be happier if it did lower my cholesterol! My bp is fine, thank you very much. Still, it doesn't hurt to try something new once in a while. So now you know all about Sunshine Juice. If you try it out, let me know what you think of it. We drink it for breakfast. Try it! You'll like it.

Chapter Six of Cats are Cool

Baby, my Special Present

When I finally came back to Brazil, things had changed very much in my life.For one thing, I was married! My new husband didn’t much like cats and I was very worried about what would happen to Princess and Muffet. I went to see them right away. They were happy with Susan. I thought for a while about the whole situation and decided the best thing I could do for the cats, for Susan and for my husband, would be to let Susan keep both cats. They had been together for two years now and we couldn’t very well separate them now! Susan lived alone, except for the cats. Yes, the best thing would be for them to stay with her. So I got used to living without cats.

That is, until one day, I received a wonderful present. I was working upstairs when my husband arrived home saying he had something to give me. I came running downstairs. Who doesn’t love a present?

What a surprise! The present was a little kitten. He was in the arms of a friend, because my husband didn’t want to touch a cat. I was amazed. He was such a little fellow. He was shaking all over and cold and a bit dirty. I knew just what his name would be: “Baby”.

He and I didn’t take long to make friends when I held him in my arms and fed him some homemade food. He began to purr and quickly fell asleep. Even my husband thought he was rather cute.

Since I had just learned that I wouldn’t be able to have children, I was going through kind of a hard time. My husband thought a cat would help me. He was right! What a wonderful present. After all, he didn’t much like cats, but he knew I did. It was such an unselfish gift, because now he would have to put up with a cat underfoot day and night! I really was touched, because I hadn’t even asked him for a cat.

The neat thing about his present is that he didn’t give me the cat because I deserved it, or asked for it or so that I would love him better. He gave me the cat because he loved me and wanted me to be happy. All I had to do was to accept the gift.

That reminded me of another gift I once received. Even better than Baby. I also didn’t ask for or deserve such a present. It was also given with much love and affection. Do you know who gave me that gift? God did. The gift was his son Jesus Christ who saved me. I didn’t have to do anything, except accept Jesus as my Lord and Saviour. That really is the best gift I ever received. It’s a present that never stops giving to me, every day of my life. Even after I leave this earth, I will still be with Jesus in heaven.

I was glad when my husband gave me Baby. The reminder of how much God loves me and his wonderful gift was a bonus.

Chapter Five of Cats Are Cool

When Princess and Muffet Made Me Sad

Princess and Muffet usually made me very happy. There was one time, though, when they made me cry. You will recall that my friend traveled to China and I was keeping Muffet for her. When she came home, it was my turn to travel to the United States and for her to keep both of the cats.

Boy was that ever a sad, sad day for me. First I gathered up all of their things, like the feeding dishes, combs, pillows, etc. and took them over to Susan’s house. Then I put Muffet and Princess in their traveling cages and drove over to her house.

When I arrived, I opened up the cages and Muffet started for just a minute and all of the sudden came running out of her cage, as if to say: “Home, I’m finally home!” Princess wasn’t so sure. She had been to this house before, and even stayed here when I went on vacation. She didn’t seem to remember anything though.

I stayed a long time watching to see how the two of them would do in the “new” house, but finally it really was time for me to go. I had to catch a plane. I knew that Susan loved both cats and would take very good care of them. Still, my eyes filled with tears and my lips trembled when I hugged each cats. Princess had lived with me for three years and Muffet for a year. It was hard to leave my friends.

There are those who say that Christians should never be sad, but that just isn’t so. When certain things happen, we have every right to be sad. God made us to feel happiness and sadness as well. Did you know that even Jesus cried when his good friend Lazarus died?

I must admit, though, it doesn’t feel very good to be sad. It was not a wonderful moment in my life when I walked out the door of Susan’s house and left the cats behind.

I sort of felt ashamed, but Susan reminded me even Jesus cried. I knew then that I didn’t need to hide what I was feeling. It’s okay to be human and feel sad when sad things happen. When I could admit what was going on inside of me, then I could talk to God about it. That surely felt better than trying to swallow my tears. I told God that I would miss my cats and my other friends as well. I asked Him to help me to be able to stand so much sadness. As I prayed, I felt God’s love for me. I knew he cared and that he understood my sadness. Then I knew that I was going to make it. I was sad, but I was okay.

I knew that during the year that I was away from Brazil I would have a lot of sad moments. I also knew that God would help me over those rough times. Susan would take good care of Princess and Muffet and God would take good care of me.

Winter time and the living is windy

This week João had a speaking engagement in Cabo Frio, which is a beach town, so of course I made the supreme sacrifice to go with him. It is only a little over 2 hours from Rio, but you seem to be in another world entirely. The white sand dunes, blue sky, mountains in the background, the sound of the ocean, all of it makes you forget the noise and crowds and hectic life in Rio. It was a great overnight getaway.
We left a couple of hours early so we could have a very late lunch on the beach. When we arrived around 3PM, we were absoluely starved. As we parked on the beach, we saw them carrying up a large fish. That's where we want to eat lunch we thought! We had a crabcake appetizer with fresh coconut water to stave off the hunger pains and then we had wonderful fish and shrimp. All that for less than half of what we pay in Rio. In addition we were eating right on the beach, watching the wind surfers, being peppered with salt water and hearing the sea gulls. The only fly in the oinment is that we were cold. Yes, I know I am whimpy, but it was around 60 degrees and very very windy. I actually enjoyed feeling all shivery, for a while anyway. We walked for a few minutes after lunch and enjoyed the beautiful beach. Brazil is so blessed with so much beautiful scenery.
The worship service was to celebrate 30 years of ministry of a seminary colleague of João. There was a crowd at the church, that included around 40 pastors from neighboring churches. It was a wonderful celebratory experience. After the service there was dinner for all. Now get this, the service ended at 10PM! We ate supper around 11:30, since the dinner was elsewhere in town. I enjoyed the company and the chit-chat, but by midnight I was fading fast.
The church hosted us at a charming little beach hotel. The owners were so nice to us (even waited up for our late arrival). We had a really good night's sleep and then had to head home the next morning. What a great break from our usual routine, however. Isn't it great to have these little intervals in our life? I didn't know the pastor in Cabo Frio, but I was delighted to get to know him and his wife. They are lovely people. I saw a number of people I knew from years ago, as I used to travel so much and preach all over. I am still discovering the fruits from that work. That is so great and so much fun. People look at me... scratch their head and then you see the light dawn. Peggy Fonseca... ah, weren't you Peggy Smith? Guilty on all counts. I don't miss the constant travels, the perpetually open suitcase, stress of travel and all that, but I do miss making friends from all over Brazil. Everything, all decisions, come with a price tag. I am more than happy to remember those friends and retouch with them once in a while, and at the same time continue to invest in my very own eccelsiastical community. (How's that for some big words?)

A bump in the road

I haven't mentioned my drawing too much lately because I have hit a bump in the road. We recently entered into the arena of colors in our classes, and I was so excited to buy my colored pencils and pastels and just took them out to look at them. When it came to actually working with colors, I felt frustrated and lost. I just couldn't make it work. I think I bought cheap pencils, but they don't flow on the paper. They can't be erased (I am the eraser queen) and there is no blending to be had. ARGH!
The exercises did not go well and I was on the verge of just quitting, deciding that I had hit by "peak" and my "artistic" phase was over. To make matters worse, one of the classes involved drawing a cluttered room. If there is anything I hate, it's drawing furniture, walls, scenery. It's just boring to me.
This week, however, our teacher abandoned the book she is using, that has served us well up to this point, and took things into her hands. She bought fruits and let us pick them and draw them last week. Everyone was feeling a little like I was, that we had suddenly regressed and couldn't draw anymore.
We all began to draw, and suddenly there was silence as we all fell to work. Gabi gave us suggestions and, at first, we all felt strange building the layers of color. We couldn't see our fruits emerging. Near the end of the class, there they were. Live and in color. I used over 6 shades to work on the gourd. (Actually it's a kind of baby pumpkin or squash.) I finished up the tangerine (also with 5 or 6 shades of reds and yellows and oranges) at home and then added in the shadows. Unfortunately I had sketched in the shadows with an orange pencil (the table was orange, so that was the color of the shadow) and the line was too heavy making my shadows funny looking with the artificial lines. I still have to learn that you can't bear down with colored pencils, as the lines are uneraseable.
At least I felt there was something recognizable in the drawing, the shading is there, along with the right coloration. So maybe there is hope for using colors. First we have to master the colored pencils. Then on to pastels and watercolors. On my, there is so much to learn. So far, I am finding color theory the greatest challenge. I still don't look at something and see the light and all the colors that go into making the shades. Practice, practice, practice. (And buy some decent colored pencils!) Friday we will be drawing plants. How many shades of green do you think I will use then?

Chapter Four - Cat's Are Cool

Princess, the Beauty Queen

When people come to my house, Princess usually comes sauntering into the room and everyone stops to look at her. “What a beautiful cat” everyone says. They want to pet her and hold her in their laps. Of course, Princess knows just how to play them for lots of attention. She is charming and elegant and everyone notices her. Even her name sets her apart. She is royalty.

You will recall, however, that another cat, by the name of Muffet, came to live with Princess. She, unlike Princess, is timid. When visitors arrive, she hides, trembling, beneath the covers until they leave. She doesn’t do cute little things to get people to notice her. She doesn’t have long silky fur like Princess. She is rather chubby around the middle, but has skinny legs, tiny ears and a short, thin tail. Everyone notices, right away the difference between the two cats. More than one person has commented, “I would like to have a cat like Princess, she is so beautiful. But I wouldn’t want a cat like Muffet.”

That always makes me a little sad, because it seems as though people have judged Muffet’s value, based on her appearance. I guess I relate more to Muffet than to Princess on that score. I am short and fat and no one would call me a beauty queen. It has always made me sad when people made fun of me or when they don’t want to be around me because I’m not beautiful.

That whole experience of the comparison between Princess and Muffet set me thinking about a verse in the Bible. “Man looks at the outward appearance, but the Lord looks at the heart.” (1 Samuel 16:7 - NIV). That verse is really true. God cares about our attitudes, how we act, about our thoughts. Those are things we can control. I can’t much control the way I look. I know for sure that God loves those who are short, tall, thin or fat. He really doesn’t care what I look like, because what I look like doesn’t determine what kind of person I am. That’s a nice feeling. Sure has changed how I think about myself.

Try taking a mirror and looking at yourself. Then think about how God sees you. What you look like isn’t that important. It’s what’s inside that counts.

That has made such a big difference for me. It makes me feel good about myself. And it makes me treat others differently. I try not to base my friendship on what people look like on the outside. God is helping me to learn to love people like he does.

Sometimes I give just a little extra love to Muffet. I want her to know that I think she is special and I like her just the way she is. That’s the way God loves me!